Chaps start 2016 with a win

Report

I would like to begin today's match report with a little clarification of the definition of an own goal, if I may:

In association football, an own goal occurs when a player causes the ball to go into his or her own team's goal, resulting in a goal being scored for the opposition.

The fact that the defending player touches the ball last does not automatically mean that the goal is recorded as an own goal. Only if the ball would not have gone past the goal-line but for the defending player would an own goal be credited. Thus a shot which is already "on target" would not be an own goal even if deflected by the defender. In this case the attacker is awarded the goal, even if the shot would have otherwise been easily saved by the goalkeeper. Some scorers will give credit to the attacker if the defender's mistake caused the own goal, similar to ice hockey. The Laws of the Game do not stipulate any rules or procedures for crediting goals to players, and indeed such records are not a compulsory part of the game.

Right, on with the report.

Chaps lined up for the first time since November last year, looking to continue their winning streak of 3 games. Our founder Farr was attending a birthday party for his daughter Darcy (a future player, if rumours are correct) so Tarplee fills in at centre back having recovered from a back injury that has kept him from playing football since last season. New signing Nick Hobbis, younger brother of goalkeeper Jordan made his debut in centre midfield alongside Whalley, with Tansley plying his trade in "Ed's role" up front as Mosedale recovers from injury. Another new signing in Adam Walley, a first generation Chap was a welcome addition to the squad and started the game on the bench alongside new father Jones.

As expected, Chaps were slow to start, lacking match sharpness but managed to limit Hewell to efforts from long range. Tomolinson coped admirably despite having to struggle with the boggiest part of the unique two-tier pitch designed by Hewell's landscape gardener. Dowsett was looking lively, and although struggling to get involved in the game, he managed to pounce on a stray pass from Hewells' defence and punish them with his 28th goal of the season, putting the Chaps in the lead.

Limited action came during the remainder of the first half, with Tansley unlucky to head wide from a sublime left sided corner delivered by Chaps' very own Barcelona youth trainee, Slater. Dowsett later shrugged off two fouls but was caught by the third, with the referee opting to wave play on as Penny played an exquisite through ball to Watkins on the left wing, who burst into the box and leapt over a wild sliding challenge before incorrectly being called back for an offside just as he was about to break the net.

The second half began slowly for Chaps, now playing uphill against a very energetic Hewell team. Noticing a gap appearing between the Chaps' midfield and defence, Penny ushered the defence high and moved into the centre of the pitch to receive a throw in from Slater, played a 1-2 with Watkins out wide and burst into the Hewell box, delivering a cross for the onrushing Hobbis who was unlucky not to score. However, Goonies NEVER SAY DIE, so the Chaps rallied quickly as the Hewell keeper punted the ball long. Slater collected the loose ball and hit a graceful long ball that Penny leapt to flick on for N. Hobbis, who's first touch in the box showed great composure, allowing him to slot home and double Chaps' lead.

Minutes later Jones was introduced for his first game since taking paternal leave, replacing Tansley who had worked his socks off upfront. Dowsett then raced onto a long ball into the boggy right hand corner and controlled superbly, beating his man and delivering a rocket of a cross for none other than Jones to put into the back of the net - how about that for a first touch! An inspired substitution by Fronk, looking on from the sidelines with a wide beaming smile, akin to the Cheshire Cat being given the opportunity to announce a riddle.

At three-nil to the good, Chaps were in full control, with confidence flowing throughout the team. A turning point in the game then reared it's ugly head, as Penny raced out of the box after defending a corner, having seen Jones and Dowsett in acres of space up front. Dowsetts' clever run into the left hand corner took the defender away and opened the centre of the pitch up for Penny, marauding forward with the Hewell defence unable to keep pace with him. Jones collected the ball and played a superb ball to Penny, who's first touch was surprisingly excellent. This, however, seemed to confuse "The Machine" as he had suddenly created a huge amount of space and time for himself with his excellent control. Sadly, he drifted off into pleasureland, with the vision of curling the ball into the top left hand corner from 40 yards, gaining adoration from the millions and millions of fans and fellow players. Upon his return to reality, he could only muster a lame effort that went straight into the keepers' arms. Turning to race back down the pitch, he watched on as Hewell managed to scuff a goal home, stealing the clean sheet away from Chaps once again.

Chaps were now under constant attack from Hewell, with J. Hobbis making some superb saves from long range. The defence were tiring, and a shot from Hewell on the left side of the box was deflected by Penny onto the post and in. As he slid, Penny looked up and saw the desiration on J. Hobbis' face as it was clear the initial strike was going straight into his impeccable arms. What is a defender to do eh.

Chaps held on for the win, with Tomolinson threatening to score an own goal but it was clear he was teasing us as he calmly dribbled the ball round the post and cleared safely. Bully, a second half substitute for Hewell, took offence to this and sat on his head.

Man of the Match today went to goalkeeper Jordan Hobbis, well deserved for his calm demeanour and superb shot stopping in tricky conditions. Chap of the Match was particularly tough today, all players put in a superb effort on a tiring pitch, I have to give it to "Siliman" Tomolinson though, who had the worst of the conditions in the first half and then had to deal with Hewells' big centre forward in the second. He didn't put a foot wrong all game, winning every single one of his tackles, and it didn't even look like he broke a sweat! Excellent composure Lee!